


Kiss Me

by insieme



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Boys In Love, Canon Compliant, Domestic Fluff, Falling In Love, First Time, Fluff, I mean it's still night, Love Confessions, M/M, Morning After, POV Magnus Bane, Post 2x07, Songfic, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, but you know what i mean, post 2x18
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-24
Updated: 2017-11-24
Packaged: 2019-02-06 10:23:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12815502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/insieme/pseuds/insieme
Summary: It had been almost a century, a century of meaningless flings and one broken heart. It had been long but short at the same time, eventually Magnus just accepting it. Accepting that maybe he wasn’t meant to love, wasn’t meant to have that in his life.And he was coming to terms with that, or at least trying to, and then he had met Alec. Beautiful, open Alexander who had taken his life and turned it sideways and upside down.or the moment Magnus realized he was in love with Alec.





	Kiss Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [blasphemous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blasphemous/gifts).



> Hello Angels! 
> 
> I wrote this as a thank you/you're amazing and I love you to [Yara](http://archiveofourown.org/users/deathdario) for everything she does. I am incredibly grateful for her and this fic was originally an emotional text message to her with a bunch of typos, so I thought I would write it properly. 
> 
>    
> If you're tweeting you can tag #insiemes so I can see them xx 
> 
> Enjoy!

_Lie down with me and hold me in your arms._

Alec’s breath was soft against his neck, soft warm puffs brushing his skin every time he let a breath out. His eyes were closed, sleep overcoming him after they had finished but Magnus didn’t mind in the slightest. He was warm and comfortable and he finally had this beautiful man in his arms. What else could he want?

He had been unable to sleep. He was tired, of course he was, but he couldn’t shut his mind off. And looking at Alec, so peaceful and soft tucked into his side, Magnus never wanted to close his eyes, for he didn’t want to miss a single second. 

His heart fluttered, stomach swooping when Alec let out a little snore, nuzzling closer and reminding Magnus exactly what else he wanted. The Shadowhunter had his arms draped around Magnus’ middle and seemed to be burrowing further into his side in sleep. Features soft and content, he looked younger in sleep but just as beautiful. 

_And your heart's against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck. I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet._

Alec’s eyes fluttered open, the dim lights of the room lighting them, hazel dark like chocolate. 

Magnus could get lost in those eyes and have no qualms. Spend the rest of his eternity staring into them and never have a single regret. Alec was one of those people who wore his heart on his sleeve and sold his soul through his eyes. It was one of the things that had initially drawn Magnus to him, his eyes. They were so open and honest even if at the time, Alec hadn’t been. 

A pang of fear filled Magnus’ chest in the first moments Alec woke up. What he was feeling - this incredible, terrifying rush of emotions - was overwhelming. A tidal wave of feelings Magnus wasn’t used to. Wasn’t something he could say he had ever experienced before. The strong emotion he got, just from the simple act of looking in someone else's eyes. 

He had fear also that maybe, just maybe, what they had done wasn’t right. Not that it had felt wrong. No, it had felt like every molecule in Magnus’ body was finally falling in place, after hundreds of years of being unsure. It had felt right in every possible way, like fate. It had felt like pure happiness, a seemingly foreign and unattainable object. 

No, he didn’t worry about it feeling wrong. He worried what he had expressed to Alec earlier in the night, that he would lose him. Alec was young and attractive and no doubt had many options since he had come out. Magnus wasn’t naive enough to think his boyfriend was the only homosexual Shadowhunter and if he had to bet, he was sure many more had come out since Alec had. 

He was Alec’s first boyfriend - first everything - what if he was just experimenting? Alec would never use him like that he knew, but the thought still lingered. If things got hard, or if Magnus’ immortality became too much, would Alec call it off in favour of someone else?

_I was made to keep your body warm. But I'm cold as the wind blows so hold me in your arms._

But those feelings evaporated in the few seconds it took Alec to open his eyes, focusing on Magnus. His glamour was back up, but looking in Alec’s eyes he saw no hesitation, none of the usual walls he worked so hard to put up during the day. He smiled at Magnus, entire face lighting up with it and Magnus’ heart didn’t stand a chance. 

“Hi.” The word was whispered, lips brushing Magnus’ skin with the proximity but eyes never leaving his. 

“Hi.” Just as tentative, just as soft. Magnus had to cut himself off from saying anything else, looking at Alec filling him with emotions. Three words on the tip of his tongue, loaded in the barrel and ready to shoot at any moment. He swallowed them down. The room was tranquil around them, the lights of the city below coming through the curtains. He dared not ruin that with some bold declaration. 

Especially so soon.

“I can hear you thinking.” Alec observed, rising up a fraction so he could look in Magnus’ eyes. And he was once again hit by the beauty, both inside and out, of this man. He had seen Alec on multiple occasions throw himself headfirst into situations, putting his heart and soul into everything he did; work, relationships and now love. 

Alec had been gentle and giving, even though it had been _his_ first time. He had made Magnus feel inexperienced, flustered and fumbling. He had worried it wouldn’t be good for him, but Alec had made sure to express to him just how good it had been, blissed out smile never leaving his face. 

It hadn’t been pretty, but it had been them. 

_Kiss me like you wanna be loved. You wanna be loved._

Alec bit his lip tentatively, seemingly debating with himself. He looked hopeful, apprehensive and so happy, all in one. 

Making up his mind, he lowered himself down so that he was hovering above Magnus, lips separated only by a fraction. “Stop thinking.” He whispered, meeting Magnus’ eyes before capturing his lips.

Magnus immediately melted below him, sinking back into the mattress, hands coming up to cup Alec’s cheeks. Warmth flooded through his chest, like warm water filling a tub. 

His lips were soft, nothing more than a slow drag of lips but Magnus felt his insides ignite with fire. He felt the thrill run through his veins, just touching Alec, kissing him, sending him into a tailspin.

Over too soon, Alec pulled back from the kiss, resting his forehead on Magnus’ with their breath mingling. His eyes were still closed but he was smiling, something he hadn’t stopped doing all night. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise.” 

_This feels like falling in love, falling in love._

His breath hitched, Alec’s soft voice reassuring him the exact thing he had been worrying about. He thought it was impossible for Alec to know that, to promise that, but when he met his eyes - those damn beautiful, beautiful eyes - he saw nothing but sincerity. 

And there was nothing Magnus could say, nothing he could do to let Alec know what those words meant to him. What the promise of at least the next little while meant. Because living forever was all fun and games until you came to the realization that you’re always going to be alone. That you’re never going to be enough. 

But in Alec’s eyes, in that moment, Magnus felt like _enough_. He felt like more than enough. 

“I -” he paused, reigning the words in, fighting to be free. It was too soon, too fast. Alec was so new to all of this and Magnus didn’t want to overwhelm him. He didn’t want to scare him away. “You’re amazing, Alexander.” 

The smile Alec gave in response was enough to make Magnus was want to forget every single responsibility he had, every doubt fluttering in his mind, just to make it appear on his boyfriends face more often. Magnus had seen many beautiful things in his lifetime, been with many beautiful people, but seeing Alexander Lightwood smiling at him, hair mussed and love bites on his neck, easily took first prize. 

_Settle down with me and I'll be your safety._

Being in Alec’s presence had a calming effect on Magnus. There was something about the Shadowhunter that just exuded protector, something that made Magnus drop his guard so quickly. When he was with Alec, touching Alec, talking with Alec, kissing Alec he felt warm, cared for and _safe_. In the middle of a war, with uncertainty around every corner, Alec made him feel like nothing could touch him, touch them. 

He felt like as long as he was in Alec’s arms, no harm would come to him. 

He found himself wanting to share parts of himself with Alec he had never shared before, never trusting anyone enough to keep the memories safe. Never trusting their reactions, the way they would look at him after. But just a few hours before Alec had seen a part of Magnus, an ugly, evil part of him, and he had told him it was beautiful. That _he_ was beautiful. Alec, a Shadowhunter, had looked the part of Magnus that was most demon quite literally in the eyes, and had smiled like they were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. 

Alec was safety and comfort. Alec was warmth and light. He was strong and passionate. He was caring and honest. 

_And with this feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now._

The realization was not so much a shock to Magnus, more like an acceptance. Yet it still took his breath away. 

It had been almost a century, a century of meaningless flings and one broken heart. It had been long but short at the same time, eventually Magnus just accepting it. Accepting that maybe he wasn’t meant to love, wasn’t meant to have that in his life. 

And he was coming to terms with that, or at least trying to, and then he had met Alec. Beautiful, open Alexander who had taken his life and turned it sideways and upside down. 

Magnus thought he knew what love was. He had felt it enough times to consider himself almost an expert of sorts at this point. He had loved many and lost many and had come to accept that’s how his life would be lived. He would always love, with the thought in his mind that it could end. 

But Alec, Alexander, he was different. Oh, was he different. Even from the first meeting, the butterflies in Magnus’ stomach that had been awoken after so many years, flying with a vigor they never had. 

The first kiss with Alec was like experiencing kissing for the first time all over again. Like it was new. And just tonight, their first time. It had been bumbling and awkward but undoubtedly the best Magnus had experienced in a very long time. 

So this love was different. It was uncharted territory. For both of them. It felt fragile and breakable, but also like it could weather any storm thrown it’s way. 

It was nothing like Magnus had ever experienced, yet everything he yearned for. 

Alec was still gazing down at him, that dopey, innocent smile on his face and Magnus got his breath back only to lose it again. He cupped his hand on Alec’s cheek, running his thumb along the bone there. “Do you want to stay?”

The words passed his lips but even before he finished Alec was nodding, nuzzling into his hand. He smiled softly, pressing a gentle kiss to Magnus’ palm where it was rested before snuggling back into the spot he was before. 

The lights were dimmed, the room quiet except the sound of their breathing slowly evening out. When he was sure Alec was asleep, he moved just slightly, pressing a barely-there kiss to his forehead. 

“I love you.”

The words needed to be spoken, threatening to suffocate Magnus with their magnitude, even if they were just whispered into Alec’s temple in the soft midnight light. The sheer amount of love in his heart was threatening to burst it, to bust it open with Alec’s name filling every inch. 

And Alec didn’t need to know just yet. If he had been telling the truth - and Magnus liked to believe that he was - than they had time for that. 

Lots of time.

_This feels like falling in love, falling in love._

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! What did you think?
> 
>  
> 
> You can find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/insiemes) if you want to chat xx


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